Comfortable in Your Own Skin

Patty and Coffee Shop

Sitting in a coffee shop reading and I literally said “Right On!” I can’t be the only one who talks out-loud when they get inspired. Right?

There are certain blogs and websites that I read and visit on a consistent basis and one of them is Hello Giggles. I was reading an article by Tamara Weston, “It’s time to reflect on why we really wear makeup.” A statement on page 2 of this article resonated with me to the point where I said out loud in the middle of a coffee shop, “Right On!” with a fist in the air, and then smiled real big.

The statement: “Whether you like a little makeup or a lot of makeup or no makeup, next time you’re grooming, just ask yourself: Who am I doing this for? Am I doing this for me, and only me? If the answer is a genuine “yes,” then we just might be able to open up the definition of beauty to a variety of meanings. I’m ready to be honest, are you?” 

I was 14 years old and I was frustrated about what to wear because I was going out with a group of friends that I felt I had to impress. My mom walked into my room and asked me “What’s going on in here?” I looked at her and said in a frustrating tone, “Why does this even matter? Why do I need to impress anyone, I like thrift vintage clothes, not name brand trendy clothes.” She smiled at me, told me to come sit down, (cue the Full House life lesson music) and said, “Mijita {endearing Spanish word that means “my little daughter”}, who are you dressing for, you or them? What really matters, your happiness or theirs? Be proud of who you are, how you dress, what you like, and what you feel good in. Take those questions into everything in your life. Wear the outfit you feel best in, smile, and go have fun.”

My mom, my mentor, my light in my life, my coffee and laughing friend. I am truly blessed that I get to be her daughter.

My mom, my mentor, a light in my life, my coffee and laughing very loud partner. I am truly blessed that I get to be her daughter.

It was an instant life change moment for me – it really was. It was then and there, that every time I’d get ready for my day, I’d ask myself, “Who am I dressing for today? Who am I putting this makeup on for today? Who am I fixing my hair for today?” and if my answer wasn’t “ME”, then I’d make sure that my thinking and actions were put in check real quick.

I know the article I read was touching on the subject of makeup specifically, but I think these questions are great questions to ask ourselves as women for EVERYTHING in our lives. Motherhood, career, marriage, fitness, friends, our relationship with God, etc.

Can we be honest about how we mother, how we handle being a wife, how we handle our work environment, how intimate we are with God, how close we are with our best friends, etc.? Can we be honest to the point that we can accept that what might work for another woman might not work for us and that it’s completely okay? Can we come face to face with ourselves and say, “I am comfortable in my own skin, and I am doing this for “ME” not for “THEM”?

… “then we just might be able to open up the definition of beauty to a variety of meanings.”  This also means, we might just be able to open up the definition of motherhood to a variety of meanings.

I’m not against primping or plucking, but I do think we should be doing those things because it makes us happier and feel more beautiful, not because we think it’s what will cause others to find us more beautiful.

That statement also rings true for motherhood and everything else we entail as women. You may think it’s best that your child only plays with wood toys, and eats organically grown food. You may think it’s best to let your kids eat cheetos, drink kool-aid, and play with your old metal toys from when you were a kid. You may think it’s best to only use organic products on your child. You may think it’s best to use good ol’ Johnson and Johnson, you survived, your kids will too. You may think it’s best to teach your kid only bible songs. You may think it’s best to introduce your kid to bible songs and then teach them the best of the 80’s songs. I think you all get the point!

We shouldn’t be against each other in whatever we choose, because whatever works for you, works for you, BUT not because you think it’s what will cause others to think more highly of you as a mom/woman, but because you are doing it for YOU!

“It is not whether you do your hair or curl your lashes, or even what you wear. It is how you approach doing those things.” 

Does of reality! Oh know!

A dose of reality and a kick in the pants! Oh know!

The statement above sums it all up! We as women should work on coming to the realization that it’s not whether we are the most organic mom, or the pinterest mom, or the keeping it old school mom, it’s how we approach doing those things. (cough*grace*cough) As the writer said at the end of her article, “I am ready to be honest. Are you?”, I think it’s time we asked ourselves that same question.

What do you want to be honest with yourself about? Will you make the steps to be comfortable in your own fabulous “mom/woman” skin? Will you work on giving grace to those who may not do it how you do it and not pass judgment?






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3 Responses to Comfortable in Your Own Skin

  1. Avatar
    Amy January 22, 2015 at 12:20 pm #

    LOVE THIS! Lets lose the pressure to be like others and be ourselves!!!

    • Avatar
      Patty January 23, 2015 at 1:58 pm #

      I agree! Losing the pressure is key, you are right on with that. Freedom oh Freedom is so much better than the comparison game. Thanks for the kind words.

  2. Avatar
    Kristi January 24, 2015 at 8:41 am #

    Absolutely love this!

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