The birth story of our first son started in 2014. We began by researching adoption agencies, filling out mountains of paperwork, standing in line at government offices, and organizing fundraisers. In October of 2014 the real wait started.
Our profile was live for birth moms to view, and all we could do was live our normal lives and wait. We kept busy by organizing more fundraisers and filling out grant paperwork. I decorated a nursery, probably way too early, but it kept me busy. I don’t know if it’s fair to say that my mood swings equaled that of a pregnant woman (I can say this because I have now experienced adoption and pregnancy), but I do recall sobbing in the car in the Sprouts parking lot on my 28th birthday, because I wanted a baby so badly.
At that point, we had been waiting for 4 months. Two months later, on April 15th, I was at my babysitting job where I watched 3-year-old twin boys. I was getting them dressed for Wednesday night church and my phone was in the kitchen. Once they were dressed, we went outside to wait for their mom, and I grabbed my phone off of the counter. I had 13 missed calls from an unknown number and my husband. And I KNEW, just from looking at my phone, that we were going to be parents.
We met the birth parents 4 days later and learned about their baby boy. I went to an ultrasound with his birth mom on April 30th. His due date was May 23rd, but she knew he would come early. On May 15th, my husband went to work and I stayed home to clean and make freezer meals. I took my time getting ready that morning, and I had just gotten out of the shower when my phone rang. Our son was HERE. He came so fast that his birth dad hadn’t even had a chance to call our caseworker. He was born only 40 minutes after his birth mom’s arrival at the hospital.
His birth parents named him Devon Scott, but we called him Scott. The next few days were a blur. We spent our days in a too-small hospital room and came home at night to sleep, because the hospital was too full to allow us to stay as guests. We shared diaper changes and feedings with his birth parents and their families. We followed their lead and did things when asked, but we tried as best as we could to stay in the background. This was their time to have with their son before he became ours. We took him home from the hospital three days later. It was a bittersweet day. It was very hard for me to watch his birth mom say goodbye to her son, but I was also excited to finally introduce him to our family.
When he was a few weeks old, his birth parents went to court and terminated their parental rights. We had a six month trial period where he was in the custody of our adoption agency, and we were his foster parents. We had monthly visits with our agency to make sure things were going well. We had to notify them any time we left the state, but other than that, our life was pretty typical of any new parent. When those six months ended, we went to court, changed his name to Scott Richard Devin Keck, and signed papers that legally made him our son. We have an open adoption with Scott’s birth parents. We see his birth mom every couple of months, and Scott has a very special relationship with her. She raised four kids before Scott was born, and her advice has been invaluable to me.
There’s a lot of this story that won’t fit in a blog post. Adoption is a long, expensive, and emotional road. We had a lot of drama towards the end, and even once he was adopted. But as we are about to celebrate the 4th birthday of our construction truck-loving, train-obsessed little boy, I can easily look back and say we would do it again in a heartbeat. I love sharing our story, even the hard parts. If you have any questions about adoption, I would love to answer them!